caffeine, ramblings, and tech

10 Random Improvements to Everyday Items

This has been bothering me for a while… We’ve been getting protein bars from the store for quick snacks and for some reason, I’m not always satisfied after eating one.  What I really mean is that I want to eat another one or four because I’m still hungry.  I then started thinking about how much more substance I could get if they would stop putting that silly layer of chocolate, chocolate chips, or other “sweet” layer of goodness.  Now you’re shaking your head at me because you’re going to tell me that’s the best part.  But how much more “bar” could you get if you got rid of the chocolate – 10% more?  Maybe 25% more…

  1. Give me more substance in my protein bars
  2. Starbucks coffee that’s 10-20 degrees cooler.  I swear that I burn my mouth every single time.  The blonde roast is great by the way… But Caribou is still better, sorry.
  3. Yogurt lids that don’t fart yogurt on you.  It always happens when you least expect it and when you’re wearing nice clothes.  You get super hungry and don’t even think when you open the yogurt and then… it farts on you and you now have yogurt on your shirt.
  4. Nail clippers that didn’t fling the nail across the room.
  5. Urinals that eliminate splash back - first world male problem.
  6. Locks on click pens to eliminate them from accidentally clicking open in your pocket to reduce the ink from ruining your pants/shirt.
  7. Battery covers on remotes that don’t fall off when the remote is dropped.  It’s really annoying when the cover slides under the couch.  Out comes the duct tape…
  8. The option to get cheaper airfare if you decline the meal or “complimentary” beverages.  This could potentially reduce the number of flight attendants too.  Seems like a great money saver.
  9. Give your customers free wifi if they buy something.  Also, don’t make them sign up with a 3rd party service to do it.  Just give them the wifi password – you can change this everyday too.
  10. For heavens sake, give me the ability to pay my student loans with my credit card.  I want to rewards.  If you think this is a bad idea just remember that it’s the card holder’s responsibility to be responsible.  If you’re stupid enough to use your credit card, which has a much higher interest rate, and you decide to not pay it off on time then that’s your fault.

Short and sweet!  I really think #8, #9, and #10 have some merit.  Go forth, make it happen, and I’ll use it!

What are some of your recommendations?

Image Source:  ladybugbkt

Falling Ice Smashes Lexus – Minneapolis

When an ice chunk falling at high speeds meets a parked Lexus, who wins?  The ice chunk…

This happened earlier this afternoon in downtown Minneapolis.  When there are signs saying “Watch out for falling ice” you might want to watch out…

Levenger Shipping FAIL

Today I received some of my Levenger order.  When I saw the package I was ecstatic!  After opening I was then saddened…  I only received half of my order.  As you can see, the packaging is much much larger than the items in the box.  Thus, one would think that they got everything.  I think a padded envelope would have been sufficient.

Package Contents:

Items to be Shipped:

Let’s see if I get a TV sized box for the rest of the goodies.  OK, I’m being a little sarcastic.  I’m sure they do flat rate shipping.  This would explain the “larger” boxes.

Bunny Stew

I have had repeated requests for a kick butt recipe for bunny stew… so here it is!!!

INGREDIENTS:

  • 2 large Easter Bunnies (or five little baby bunnies), clubbed and skinned
  • 3 cups Campbell ‘s Fiesta Nacho Cheese Soup
  • 1 can Red Bull
  • 4 cans of Budweiser or other premium beer. Don’t let Pastor see you buy this! And don’t worry – the booze evaporates in the heat.
  • 1/2 to 3/4 cup Kraft Mac & Cheese
  • 1/2 cup Hellmann’s mayonnaise
  • Carrots left over from luring bunnies to their death (cut off any little bunny teeth marks — no one wants to see that)
  • 2 to 3 cans of store-brand potatoes
  • 1 medium Tombstone “Supreme” pizza, chopped
  • 1/2 cup frozen corn kernels
  • 1/2 cup frozen lima beans
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 cup of Heinz ketchup
  • 1/2 teaspoon MSG
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
  • 4 tablespoons flour mixed with an equal amount of root beer

PREPARATION:

Have your children peel off all the cute, fuzzy-wuzzy pelts of the bunnies (reserve them to make holiday-themed, furry napkin rings) and rip the flesh from the dead rabbit’s brittle little bones. You Martha Stewarts out there will want to reserve the bloody bunny skeletons to make stock, but if you ask me, instant soup is a whole lot easier! In a General Electric crock-pot, combine the hunks of bunny your children have ripped off the freshly-clubbed animal and all the other ingredients. Bring to a simmer and simmer uncovered for 10 minutes. Cover and cook over low heat for no less than four days.

Before serving, ladle a holiday glaze over the stew (you make this by heating a brick of Velveeta cheese-product with mini-marshmallows, 2 cups of brown sugar, a Three Musketeers bar, and a can of Diet Pepsi until they are all gooey, but not boiling). Embed two handfuls of General Mill’s Trix breakfast cereal into the glaze. Voila, Easter dinner is served!

via http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0406/easterbunnystew.html

Bunnies were not harmed in the creation of this post.

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Wohoo!  Upgraded to the new version and managed to lose all of my previous stuff..  Luckily there wasn’t that much lost.. Looks like I get to start something new :)